


HUSH

by lilidelafield



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 04:36:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7962706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilidelafield/pseuds/lilidelafield
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cockerels, cows and pigs all making a hullabaloo in Central park? What on earth is going on?</p>
            </blockquote>





	HUSH

“Cock-a-doodle-dooo!”

The crowing of a cockerel startled the two lovers, lying in one another’s arms beneath the bushes. They giggled and kissed again.

“Mwoooaah!”

Lucy pulled away from the kiss and raised her head.

“Did you hear a cow or am I going loopy?”

Her companion raised himself on his left elbow and stared at her, listening hard.

“Mwoooaah!”

“Unless we’re both going loopy. But there are no cows in Central Park.”

They listened, but all they could hear now were the birds twittering and the distant sound of children playing.

“Good, they’ve gone. Where were we?” He lay down again and Lucy slipped her hand inside his shirt.

“About…here I think…”

“Oink! Oink! Oink!”

Lucy pulled free and struggled to a sitting position. She looked around.

“Pigs! Tim, are you sure this is Central park and not your uncle’s farm in Illinois?”

“Of course its Central Park, and they don’t have pigs, cows or cockerels in Central Park.”

“They have a zoo, don’t they?”

Tim laughed and shook his head.

“How many zoos have you been to Lulu that have cows and pigs on display? It’s gotta be some guy pulling a prank on us, that’s all.”

Lucy got up and looked all around.

“There’s a little old lady on that bench just here…do you think it might be her? There’s no one else around.”

At that moment, a chill ran up and down their spines at the sound of an evil cackle that seemed to come from right behind them. Lucy whipped around. All she saw was the bush. She clung to Tim, who put his arm around her.

“All right Lulu.” He said, putting a brave face on it. “Let’s get out of here.”

As they hurried away, they heard the distinctive sound of a wolf whistle. Still no one in sight. They started to run. They bought themselves a soda and chose a bench to sit on next to the path away from talking trees or bushes or disembodied cackles. As they sipped their drinks, cuddling close together, they played their old game of Passing Strangers. They would pick out a stranger passing by, and the other would have to decide what they did for a living. The first was a young red-headed woman wearing jeans and a white shirt, walking alone, looking left and right, as though she had lost someone.

“Her!” Lucy nodded at the woman. Tim grinned.

“Easy. She’s a housewife. Taking the family dog for a walk. She’s lost it by the looks of it.”

Lucy agreed. Next, from the other direction came a handsome man, dressed in an immaculate dark grey suit, navy tie, perfectly manicured, with dark hair and eyes.

“What about that one?”

Lucy smiled slightly as she studied him.

“Hmmm.” She watched the man approach the woman, and they were both looking all around and talking earnestly.

“Looks like they know each other. Perhaps they’re both looking for a lost dog. Otherwise he could be anything. A bank manager?”

Tim nodded. He glanced around looking for another target. He soon spotted one. This one was dressed in sweats, large perspiration stains under both arms and in a wide strip down his back. He was small, with a shock of fair hair and startlingly blue eyes.

“What about him?”

“Oooh, he’s dreamy!” Lucy seemed to forget everything else as she watched the blond man jogging closer. Tim nudged her indignantly.

“Oi!”

She grinned at him.

“He’s not real. He’s every girl’s dream date.”

“Be serious!”

“I dunno. He looks pretty smart. A doctor maybe? A scientist?”

“A scientist? Are you for real? He looks like he’s only just out of college! He might be a boxer in training?”

“No way!”

Lucy disagreed. She grabbed his arm.

“Look, that other two…he knows them too!”

The three strangers all seemed to be talking earnestly, and as the young lovers listened, an odd word drifted to their eager ears.

“…find it…never…trouble…try an orange…”

Tim and Lucy looked at each other.

“Whatever they are looking for, it seems important.”

“We could offer to help?”

They got up and strolled up the path. The young woman looked up and pointed at the two teenagers coming towards them.

“Why don’t we just ask?”

Her companions looked skeptical and she shrugged.

“Couldn’t hurt.”

Lucy smiled as they approached.

“You guys are looking for someone…or something? We got nothing else to do. Can we help you search?”

The young woman nodded and gestured to her friends.

“I’m April. That is Napoleon, Illya. We’ve lost a Mynah bird. Black, with an orange beak…he’s called Hush, and he doesn’t like crowds…he flew away…Stressed out!”

“A stressed out Mynah bird?”

April nodded.

“He’s very talkative. You could keep your eyes and ears open…”

Lucy and Tim stared at one another and started laughing. 

“Cockerels, cows and pigs, a wolf whistle and an evil cackle…right?” Grinned Tim. The others looked at one another. Illya nodded.

“You have evidently heard him somewhere?” he said in a sexy accent. Tim nodded. “This way.”

They led the three strangers back to their favourite bush.

“We were…er…down there when we heard all those weird noises. We thought the park was haunted. It must be your mynah bird.”

April brought out an orange from her pocket and started to peel it, and called softly.

“Hush…come on now…Hush!”

“You sound ridiculous!” Illya muttered darkly. “Fancy calling it Hush!”

“It’s such a noisy bird, that’s all anyone ever said to it!” April replied with a grin. “Hush!”

There was a screech and a black bundle of feathers landed on the red head’s shoulder and started to peck at the oranges in her hand. She smiled warmly.

“Thank you for your help.” They turned to go.

“Wait!” Tim called. The three paused and glanced back, Hush growing restive. Tim shuffled his feet.

“Um…could you tell us what you do for a living?”

The three strangers smiled at one another.

“We work for our UNCLE” April replied.


End file.
